Date Kit

Archive / RSS

Nov 29

DK: Lady, how would you feel about answering this question:
"what pair of shoes should I wear to realize my metrosexuality"
Lady: i would probably tell them to not bother
because they are gay
DK: Next Q...
Lady: *cracks knuckles*
DK: At the bar, how does a gentleman know if a lady wants to pursue a fleeting bedroom romance? If she does, what is the most advisable course of action?
Lady: i would like to answer this question with the lyrics to the popular dolly parton song "potential new boyfriend"
"Pretty as a picture
Comin' on so strong
She's twisting my ignition key
Turn my motor on
But anyone can see, all her attention's on me"
Lady: you'll have to use your imagination and change the "he's" to "she's" and so forth
a girl will give you her undivided attention
if she wants you
buy her a few drinks
get tanked
ask her for a "cigarette"
go outside, have a smoke, eat her face
...take her home
easy as pie
DK: On what criteria does a lady decide to give you her undivided attention?
Lady: well, i can tell you what THIS lady is looking for
but it's different with all ladies; different ladies, different poisons
DK: But you realize your position is as spokesperson for ladyhood?
Lady: ok fine
most ladies are looking for someone relatively handsome, and relatively free of std's
with a compatable "personal style" and confidence
you should probably ooze confidence
pretty basic, don't be a pussy
was that good enough for your emosogenist [sic] blog?

Page 1 of 1